15 Comments
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Melanie R. Jordan NBC-HWC's avatar

JP, I think most of us in the business world at some time have had a higher-up take credit for something that was your idea.

The best leaders are self-confident enough to give credit where credit is due. I always did that for my people and let them shine.

JP Bristol's avatar

Thank you, Melanie. Unfortunately, you’re probably right. What always surprised me was how often the people doing it probably wouldn’t describe themselves that way.

Baimba Yilla, EdD's avatar

Plainly written yet penetrating and effective. Thank you for your leadership perspective and insights on the kind of orientation we should all have.

JP Bristol's avatar

Thank you, Baimba. I wish I could say that observation came from a single experience. It didn’t.

Ken Hyra 🇨🇦's avatar

JP, the Access Tax is a clean concept, and I liked the line underneath it: the need to be seen is what opens the door, not the vulnerability itself.

I work with husbands who pay a version of this inside their marriages every day. They don't trust their own read of the room until she confirms it.

They open completely in moments of connection and feel exposed when the warmth shifts.

The need for her approval is what's costing them, not the closeness itself.

You named something that most people feel and can't locate.

That's the work.

JP Bristol's avatar

Funny how some patterns are easier to recognize in hindsight, Ken.

Ken Hyra 🇨🇦's avatar

They are always 20/20!

Marcela Distefano's avatar

I like it! And you are right. It’s so…human. We are always looking for validation, from parents, children, partners, friends…we have to start validating ourselves first.

JP Bristol's avatar

Thank you, Marcela. I suspect that’s a lifelong project for a lot of us. I know it has been for me.

Data Frank's avatar

JP, The part that stood out to me is that people rarely lose their best ideas first. They lose confidence in their own judgment first, and the ideas follow.

A lot of creators do the same thing. They keep looking for proof from someone else when the real evidence is the work they've already done.

How many good ideas stay hidden because their creator is still waiting for permission to trust themselves?

JP Bristol's avatar

Good observation, Frank. The line about losing confidence before losing ideas gave me pause. I’ve seen that happen more than once.

Data Frank's avatar

Yeah, that’s a real one. Ideas usually don’t disappear first confidence does. Once doubt creeps in, people start second-guessing what they already know, and the idea gets buried under hesitation rather than lost completely.

John Marshall's avatar

Interesting perspective on a transaction we have all experienced and attempted to learn from.

JP Bristol's avatar

Thank you, John. What struck me over the years was how ordinary the whole thing usually looked from the outside.