I love this: "Growth comes from finding people who challenge you without dismissing you."
The real key is the last part to discuss without dismissing the other person. You and the teacher had a mutual respect without showing it. You both listened, leading to a deeper understanding. We need more of this approach.
This is what I teach couples or individuals,constantly, just in a different room than yours.
For me the line, "he treated my arguments as worth answering," brought to my mind the entire difference between a marriage where disagreement is something to survive and one where it's something to explore.
Most couples I work with have stopped doing what you and your teacher were doing and they've started defending instead of answering.
Friction that creates clarity instead of heat is not a bad description of what good communication actually requires.
Most people think it requires agreement.
It requires the opposite, two people willing to stay in the room long enough to actually hear what's being said.
You were lucky to have a teacher who saw what was underneath the mohawk before you saw it yourself.
"He engaged every point like it deserved an answer." I had to read that line 3 times. More people need to learn how to do this.
I love this: "Growth comes from finding people who challenge you without dismissing you."
The real key is the last part to discuss without dismissing the other person. You and the teacher had a mutual respect without showing it. You both listened, leading to a deeper understanding. We need more of this approach.
Hey JP,
This is what I teach couples or individuals,constantly, just in a different room than yours.
For me the line, "he treated my arguments as worth answering," brought to my mind the entire difference between a marriage where disagreement is something to survive and one where it's something to explore.
Most couples I work with have stopped doing what you and your teacher were doing and they've started defending instead of answering.
Friction that creates clarity instead of heat is not a bad description of what good communication actually requires.
Most people think it requires agreement.
It requires the opposite, two people willing to stay in the room long enough to actually hear what's being said.
You were lucky to have a teacher who saw what was underneath the mohawk before you saw it yourself.